Tag Archives: Me

Don’t piss off the peanut gallery

22 Mar

Dear Future Hubby,

If you want to win me over, the best way to do that would be to win my friends over first.

FYI We sit around at brunch talking about you like this

I find it fitting that I’m writing this entry as my BFF to the max, girl who is going to be my MOH whenever I find one of you worthy enough, KHiggers, is winging her way here to Los Angeles for a ridiculous weekend of day drinking at Disneyland, saying stupid shit, being girly, and of course, seeing The Hunger Games.  We clearly have our priorities. She, along with my small group of super close friends, are probably the opinions I value the most, especially when it comes to guys.

Given my previously revealed rules about relationship jinxing, if I’m actually telling them about a guy, they know shit just got real and I must really like this dude. Therefore, they must immediately grill me for all information about him, request an introduction, and start determining if he is good enough or not.  Given this, winning me over should not only be one of your goals, but if you mean enough to me that I’ve actually told them about you, well, you better step up your A game, not doing anything stupid, and work on wooing them as well

 

I’m one of those girls that definitely tends to think more with her heart than her head.  It tends to get my in trouble sometimes, as I may not always think before acting, trust too easily, etc. But you know what? That’s ok because sometimes you just have to take a risk. And if it doesn’t work out, that’s what friends are for. To slap you upside the head when you’re being dumb, ridiculous, and crying over a guy in the Target parking lot while not remembering that your new mascara is not waterproof.

 

Last summer, I started casually dating this great guy. After realizing this was the first time in a while that I had actually LIKED someone (and liked him enough to not even mention him on this blog till now), I slowly started telling a small select group of friends about him. He was funny, he was smart, and most importantly, he “got me.” While most of my friends thought our relationship was adorable and that he really liked me, KHiggers didn’t like him from the start, mainly due to the fact that when I recounted our first date, she was appalled by some of his behavior and attitude towards me.  Even though she is my BFF, I took the opinion with a grain of salt moving forward since everyone else seemed to think he was the cat’s pajamas just like I did.  Next time this happens to me, someone please remind me to ALWAYS listen to KHiggers. Always. There is a reason the girl is my best friend.

Dinner parties = feeding you to the wolves

After a few months, things started to change. Crash, boom, bang, it just didn’t work out. No harm, no foul, relationships don’t work out all the time.  But it was really interesting to see how all the points that KHiggers had made to begin with were some of the main reasons it just didn’t work out. It was also just hilarious to hear my friends who had at one point liked him, completely trash him and tell me I was better off without him. Clearly, that’s what real friends are for.

 

So FH, at the end of the day, you have to remember what you’re stepping into. I’ve known them a lot longer than I’ve known you. I trust them with my life and I know that they have my back.  They will have no problem giving me their honest opinion of you (especially KHiggers) and if you do break my heart, get ready for them to start telling me (and probably you) that they think you’re a complete and total douchelord that should be dropped immediately.

Xo,
Your Future Wife

Truthful tales of a talker

24 Jan

Dear Future Hubby,

The only other reason for sarcasm

I like to talk. A lot. Probably a little too much if I’m talking about something I’m excited about. Or passionate about. Or my job. Get me talking about the latest celebrity gossip and you probably won’t get me to shut up for hours. Or today’s Oscar nominations? Yeah, I’d rather not continue to discuss my displeasure over the lack of nominations for Drive because it’s already been a very difficult and trying morning with that news. But oddly enough, for as much as I like to talk, and for as much as I fear I babble, it takes me a while to open about myself and my life.

Opening up about anything other than general pleasantries and mindless chit chat is about the same as breaking one of the three rules of jinxing. But hell, if you’ve already broken those, I guess this would be the unwritten fourth rule of jinxing. I always fear that opening up about my thoughts, my feelings, my life, my background, makes everything real. You can learn so much about a person from those things. Their fears. Their loves. Their weaknesses. Their hatreds. Their passions. Their faults. At the end of the day, what really just makes them tick and why they are the way they are. You expose all of those and you have nothing left to hide behind anymore. Everything is laid out on the table and the only thing you can think is “Oh my god, what if he knows all of this, thinks I’m crazy, and bolts.”

As terrifying as that may be, at some point you’re either going to have to do it or face being alone. At some point, there will be that one person where you end up sitting there, fighting internally with yourself because you know if you don’t let down those walls, you’ll lose them. And the pain and discomfort of losing them may just in fact be more terrifying than having to share your life story, share why you don’t get along with your father or your mother, why you are a workaholic, or what your biggest pet peeve is, etc.

It probably doesn’t help much that I’m ridiculously sarcastic and getting a non-sarcastic word in edgewise can be difficult. But at the end of the day, remember that the  main reason for sarcasm is that it is a defense mechanism. The more sarcastic I am, the less I have to open up and talk about other things. The more I’m able to just skim the surface and hand out the sugar coated version. Newsflash. Nothing sugar coated is every real. There’s always more to the story, if you really want to take the time to find out about it.

So if you’re really interested, if you really care and want to get to know me, just ask. Act interested. Act like you care. The sooner you accomplish that, the sooner I’ll let my walls down and let you into my world, even if I’m still absolutely terrified and scared shitless to do so. If I didn’t deep down really want to let you in, I wouldn’t be on this merry-go-round in the first place.

Xo,
Your Future Wife

Wedding Dress Wars: Royal Wedding Style

29 Apr

Dear Future Hubby,

Kate Middleton TOTALLY stole my wedding dress.

I couldn't have designed a more perfect dress

Remember that time that I finally (after years of school girl crush denial) accepted the fact that you were NOT Prince William and I was NOT going to marry him? Remember how I had gladly accepted Kate Middleton (cause let’s be real, she’s gorgeous and classy)? Well, after waking up in the middle of the night to watch the Royal Wedding (like all of the other girls who grew up hoping one day they’d marry Prince William) I started to reconsider my willingness to give up Wills to Kate. Kate had TOTALLY stolen my wedding dress!

Let’s rewind a little here. Back to when I was six and my fascination with the Royal family started after I was cast at Queen Victoria in the school play. I got to wear a purple velvet dress. It was the fanciest thing I had ever seen in my super long six year existence.  Clearly being a perfectionist, I HAD to do research on the Royals which led me to sitting in front of a TV, watch Charles and Diana’s wedding from ’81 on a VHS. From there, a fascination was born. It was beautiful. It was regal. It was a fairytale. It was a fairytale that was always fun to dream about.  Yes, I’m not really THAT delusional that I ACTUALLY thought I’d marry Prince William, but as a little girl, it was a nice fairytale to believe in. I couldn’t be happier with William’s choice in Kate, but when she stepped out of that car in front of Westminster today, I couldn’t help in my half asleep state but say “Dude, bitch TOTALLY stole my dress!”

I wouldn't mind this dress either

As I have made perfectly clear on this blog, I heart Grace Kelly like WHOA! She is a fashion icon to me and ever since I first saw her wedding dress, I knew that I wanted my wedding dress to be similar to hers.  I’ve even blogged about it before. The lace bodice. The A-Line skirt. The train. Plus, after spotting a Watters dress in a bridal magazine I happened to be flipping through a few months back, even stumbled upon the best modern day creation (without have to design my own dress) that I thought would best suit the Grace Kelly look.

That was until Kate stepped out of her car this morning and I immediately went “That’s my dress.” Now, I know it’s not MY dress. It’s Kate dress that Sarah Burton designed which is vaguely reminiscent of Grace Kelly’s dress. And the fact that Kate has worn this Alexander McQueen dress means that if when I do get married, I may be able to get a pretty decent knock off of the dress (if I can’t afford to have Sarah Burton come design me my own dress). I guess I really should be thanking Kate for that. If I have to go and see my dream wedding dress on someone else, I’m at least glad it was her. She rocked that dress (plus the one she wore to the reception tonight) and looked like a perfect fairytale princess. The kind all of us girls dreamed of being while growing up.

At the end of the day, at least they didn’t get married in Ireland and steal my entire idea of Gaelic Gala. We just better hurry up and get married before they go and decide to renew their wedding vows and steal that whole concept as well. I already lost a perfectly good Future Hubby and a wedding dress to her. I’m not losing a venue and event plan as well.

Xo,

Your Future Wife

Select a freaking status!

8 Nov

Dear Future Hubby,

I can't believe I'm thanking a dude that wears sandals like that

I’d like to personally thank Mark Zuckerberg for inspiring this post. Yes. That’s right. Not you, but the Zuck, who is no doubt up in Palo Alto creating more useless ways to make Facebook more addicting while counting his billions Scrooge McDuck style.  Regardless, the Zuck has made it ridiculously easy for all mankind (at least the ones who believe in FB) to find out if A: the person they have a thing for is single or taken and B: if said person would even be interested in you to begin with.  That being said, I sincerely hope you not only have a Facebook account (this will make stalking each other during the early relationship stages much easier), but also that you take the time to help a girl out and update your “Relationship Status” and your “Interested In” sections.

I’m (almost) 27 years old. I do not have time to figure out if you have a girlfriend or not. I don’t have time to figure out if my gaydar is failing me. My life is already busy enough, so please don’t make me hunt around, all super spy style to try and figure these things out.

I’ve recently acquired two new guy friends. I say acquired cause it sounds like I picked them up at the flea market while purchased some vintage nightstands.  I met neither at a flew market, but it just makes them seem even that much cooler than they are. Both are good looking guys and I’m sorry, but when you’re (almost) 27 and hopelessly single, you can’t help but look at any guy you meet as a prospective Future Hubby. Even if they prove you wrong in the first thirty seconds.

Both newly acquired friends though kept me guessing for a while. While one was clearly straight and a total ladies man, his ability to flirt and make me feel like I was the most important girl in the room threw me off. For a few days, I actually thought “Hmmm, could Preppy McPrepperson really be in to me?” Sadly, once we became Facebook friends, I was informed he had a girlfriend. A long term girlfriend. Back to the drawing board we go. I would like to thank him thought to utilizing the Zuck’s idea to make it easier for me. I’m glad I did not waste more than a couple of days looking at Preppy as a potential male suitor, though I will admit he will always be easy on the eyes, girlfriend or not.

This screen IS your friend

Other newly acquired friend, Sir Laughs A Lot, isn’t as much of a fan of the Zuck’s idea though, despite having an FB profile. While Sir Laughy is clearly awesome, fun, and excellent at making me feel special, I was still torn between trying to figure out if he was gay or not. Certain things made me say yes, certain things made me say no, all of which could have easily been remedied by a simple updating of a facebook status.  I wouldn’t mind either way, but Sir Laughy just hasn’t known me long enough to know that my gaydar has been on the fritz for some months now.  I swear, I’ve looked into getting it fixed, but sadly the repair shop is failing me as well. It wasn’t until he finally flat out said he had a thing for another guy friend of ours that was I completely convinced that yes, my gaydar is in fact a complete and total failure. But now I have a new gay friend to make me feel awesomespice when I’m feeling craptastic.

So take note of the Facebook failures and non-failures above. Help a girl out and make it easier on us. We’re all in the same boat here. We know you try and figure out if a girl has a boyfriend or would even be interested as quickly as possible, so why not let us know if we’re wasting our time, sooner rather than later. Even if you select “It’s Complicated” at least that gives us SOMETHING to go on.

Xo
Your Future Wife

Trying to retain the Current Crush crown

27 Oct

Dear Future Hubby,

I’m not a fan of how guys know the exact moment that you have stopped thinking about them/giving a shit about them. It’s some hidden sixth sense that I’m sure you have and I’d appreciate it if you never used it on me since it’s beyond frustrating to have you (or any other guy I have on my brain) just pop up after I have 99.9% forgotten that they exist.

Sorry, the Current Crush crown has been passed

I don’t know how all guys posses this sixth sense. I’m sure there is a secret control room somewhere that flashes a red light at the exact moment a girl forgets about a guy. Then all the guys of the world congregate to come up with the most absurd, random, out of the blue way they can pop back up to ensure that they are not forgotten. Said guy is then sent off into the world to make sure that all attention is once again on them. Congratulations. You win. I remember you’re alive. I remember why I liked you to begin with. Now either stop dicking around and ask me out or just disappear while I go into the witness protection program for the next time the red alarm flashes and you have come up with some new way to weasel your way back into my consciousness.

Double Threat is/was awesome at this.  The hardest of them all to forget and literally a couple weeks after I pretty much did, insert random text conversation about our English professor. And just in case I happen to even slightly forget him, there’s always my birthday and Christmas, which comes complete with a generic text message. Gee, thanks. This past weekend, J-Squared (aka Current Crush) chatted me up out of the blue. Literally a week after I had met someone else who was on their way to replacing him as the new Current Crush. Really? You were so pissed you were going to lose your title, that you just had to pop in to say hello? Needless to say this was a complete shock…yet, somewhere deep down, I was secretly happy. Sue me, I’m a sucker for male attention. Especially when it comes from a guy I like.

Someone's a little too late to the party

Forget the fact that I haven’t really talked to him or seen him about four months, but there I was. Spending an hour of my Saturday afternoon catching up with him.  This wouldn’t be such a big deal if I had reached out to him, but it was the other way around. He reached out to me. I was pretty positive he had forgotten I was alive, much like I was hoping to at some point forget he was alive. I assume he had just come from his secret meeting where he determined the best way to reenter my life and ensure his Current Crush status was in place. I was so proud of myself for finally getting over him and here I am, back to the beginning of liking him all over again.  His flirting did absolutely nothing to help this.

So DFH, cut me some slack. If the “she’s forgotten about you” red light goes off for you, don’t take this as your sign to just show back up for a couple weeks before disappearing again. Take this as your sign to get your ass in gear and tell me you like me too or cut me loose and let me bestow the Current Crush crown on someone else.

Xo,
Your Future Wife

Getting down on the dance floor

19 Oct

Dear Future Hubby,

If I look like a spaz on the dance floor, can you please cut me some slack? I have apparently forgotten how to dance.

Damn, I was totally going to wear that skirt.

Well, not exactly forgotten how to dance. I can still bust a serious move when dancing in a group, I’m an excellent slow dancer, and when it comes to choreographed dances, I pretty much have every ‘N SYNC and Britney dance down pat. It’s the whole “hey, lets get all up on each other” dancing that I have apparently forgotten.

On Saturday night, I went out downtown with B-Swizzle and Titfield for B’s sister’s birthday. K-Hizzle came all the way from AZ to party it up at Club Seven and we even managed to convince B’s coworker Puffin to drive a minivan full of his friends downtown to meet us. Clearly, the entire night was a success.  We were all dancing up a storm on the floor where my group dancing skills were put to excellent use. Like I said, I have a black belt in this.  However, the moment I convinced Titfield to hold my purse I found myself pulled on to the dance floor by one of Puffin’s friends. Not just rocking it out group dancing, but dancing ala when Baby meets Johnny Castle in Dirty Dancing after carrying a watermelon or some previous version of my life like prom or a my last sorority formal where more body contact there is, the better. I guess you would say grinding, for lack of a better word.

The first problem with this entire scenario is that I clearly was not drunk enough. Therefore, as I was dancing with said friend of Puffin, I immediately starting thinking the following…

Pretty sure I haven’t danced like this in a long time….wait, when was the last time I danced like this? I’m pretty positive it was before I could legally drink so that’s been at least six years if not longer and I’m pretty sure the guy I’m dancing with just finally stopped having to use his fake ID. Facepalm. Am I dancing right? Do I look like a spaz? This is totally a second hand embarrassment moment except it’s first hand embarrassment at this point. Oh shit, I don’t want to spill my beer. I hope my spaz dancing doesn’t cause me to spill my beer because at this point that is the only thing making this inner monologue more manageable. Thank god I’m not wearing heels.

I'm so much better at this.

It’s not that I don’t like to dance. It’s just that it’s been a while when it comes to dancing like that. Sure, it’s like riding a bike. Sure, you just have to pretend you know what you’re doing and not care what you look like. But let’s all recap, shall we? I’m so not a club girl. Had I been a club girl when I got to LA, standing in line at every hot club in town dressed in my most whorish dress, I’m sure I would be much better at this and doing it every weekend with random sweaty guys. Excuse me while I shudder at the thought of that. That’s just not me though. I’m the girl that showed up on Saturday night wearing a dress…and Converse. I’m the girl that would rather sit at a dive bar with friends than trying to make my boobs look bigger to get into a club without paying cover. I like beer pong and flip cup and while I’m a major fan of dancing, Saturday night was clearly a refresher course. If only they had just wanted to bust out the moves to ‘N SYNC’s Pop. I would have rocked the shit out of that and not been completely self-conscious.

Johnny Castle FTW

Of course, the next time I’ll be put in a situation like this will be in another six years. Just enough time for me to completely forget again. I clearly just need to be more drunk next time.  Please make sure this is the case if you ever feel the need to be Johnny Castle to my Baby. Or at least make me feel like you think you’re dancing like a spaz as well. I’d appreciate the comradery.  

Xo,
Your Future Wife

Online dating officially on hold

12 Oct

Dear Future Hubby,

If you’re out there on OK Cupid or Plenty of Fish or any other dating site, I hate to inform you, I’m not going to meet you within the next month or so. Over the past week or so, I’ve felt like I’ve been throwing all my energy into this online dating thing as if I HAD to find a guy on there, as if that was the only way. It’s not the only way to meet a guy, though yes, in this digital age, it can only help. However, I felt like I’ve been forcing myself a little too much to try and make it work. To try and find someone, to try and date people from it. You know what? I suck at that. Well, maybe I don’t suck, but I definitely suck at having any sort of enthusiasm anymore for it.

 

Who would want to online date after seeing this creepy picture?

 

At the beginning of this whole online dating adventure, I was excited to try it. I legit was. But over the weeks and months that passed, my interest waned. I found it to be a chore more than something I actually looked forward to checking up on every night when I got here. So here I am, months later and I find myself saying ok to drinks with some guy that I really have absolutely zero interest in dating and I can’t remember the reason why I even added him to my favorites list in the first place. I spent one whole night last week feeling like I had been slacking at the whole online dating thing that I made it my mission to respond to every guy that had message me back in the past week, only to get a bunch of responses back and not give a shit about any of them. Note to self: this is not the way to find a hubby.

Sure, I’m 26. I’m certainly not getting any younger, but since when did I find the need to put so much pressure on myself to online, to find a boyfriend?

So welcome to No Online Dating month. From now until November 12, I am ridding myself of the world that has seeming sucked the fun out of dating for me. No more OK Cupid. No more Plenty of Fish. I need a break.  People always say when you forget about something, stop focusing on it, that’s what it gets dropped right into my lap. Maybe one month of no online dating will force me to, gasp, meet someone in the real world. At a bar. At a restaurant. At a god damn house party playing flip cup. All I know is, maybe if I focus my attention on other areas of my life, something might happen, or when I go back to online dating in a month, I’ll be rejuvenated, refreshed and ready to go through some more profile. It’s like I’m going to a really long excursion to Burke Williams. If only life was that sweet…

Don’t think this means you’re off the hook for the next month, Future Hubby. I’ll still have plenty of stuff to rant to you about. I just won’t be pulling inspiration from the computer screen in front of me. At least not for 30 days.

Xo,
Your Future Wife

Fitting in with friends

7 Oct

Dear Future Hubby,

You better get along with my friends because they’ve been around longer than you so they have seniority.

NOT our booth. Ours is better.

Last night I had “family drinks” with some friends. I call it “family drinks” because in reality, that’s what it is. They are my little Los Angeles family (JAA-Rule, Skinny Jeans, The Suit, Prosciutto, and Elf) and have seen me through thick and thin since we all starting working together. We’ve now all gone our separate ways, working at different companies than the one that all brought us together, but every month or two, we plop down at the back booth table at Snake Pit, eat $2.99 nachos and vent about life, love, work, and how snazzy The Suit looks…well, in a suit. It is of utter importance that you pass the approval test of not only them, but my other friends as well. This is how I will know you are a keeper.

I’m sure every girl worries about how their future spouse will fit into their group of friends. Some girls are perfectly happy giving their guy preference over their friends, but here’s the thing. These people have seen me cry. They’ve seen me come to drinks with no make up on. They’ve seen me be a 14 year old girl and freak out over a guy. They’ve been the ones to give me advice when going on dates. This is not something I can walk away from. A support system like that is crucial to me and I am in no way prepared to give that up.

I promise they won’t sit there with ratings cards and hold them up every once after every joke you tell. It won’t be like a beauty pageant, but they will definitely be judging you on how you treat me, how you interact with them, and if you are cool enough to be a family member. JAA-Rule was not an original family member, but she came, she tried out, she passed with flying colors and I have no doubt that if you’re cool enough for me to date, you’re cool enough to get in their good graces. Just to help you out though, here are some little tips that will come in handy when seeking their approval…

Extra points if you can spot this man

  • Order nachos for the table. Or a pizza. We’re fans of both. But if it’s quesadilla night, better order two or three. Those things are small.
  • Come with a story about someone we all used to work with that we all somehow don’t like for different reasons. This, of course, means you’d have to be friends with one of these people to get a story or know someone that knows them, but I bet your up to the challenge.
  • Point out any celebs that may walk in to the bar. Last night, you would have gotten double points since we had Nev from Catfish, plus David Faustino from Married with Children. Triple bonus points if you spot a drunk Andy Dick walk in and then promptly get kicked out.
  • Don’t sit on your blackberry the whole night…even though we might.
  • Suggest, plan, and implement HARD drinks. We’re horrible at doing this, as hard drinks is something we’ve always talked about doing but never got around to. It’s weekend drinks instead of work week drinks and it’s tons of more alcohol. If you can get us all to do this and then buy a round, you’re in.
  • Offer boy or girl advice to whoever needs it. Especially if a family member is going on a blind date with someone you happen to know. Don’t hold out on us.

If you can take all my advice and be as cool as I know you can be (cause duh, I’m dating you) you have a pretty good shot at becoming part of the family. If you’re gonna be my Future Hubby, you’re going to win over my friends first.

Xo,
Your Future Wife

Head shot hell

10 Sep

Dear Future Hubby,

If you’re an actor, chances are I’m not going to give you much of a chance at all. Unless your name is Tom Hiddleston.

Awkward pose, party of one

One of the hazards of living in Los Angeles is the abundance of pretty people just trying to act. You can’t take two steps without running into an actor, unemployed or famous. Our restaurants and local Starbuck’s are crowded with waiters just trying to make ends meet so they can keep going on auditions and taking classes.  This isn’t to say that all actors are superficial. I’m not saying that all, but after years of experience with living with them, being around them, working with them, it’s hard to imagine dating one.

In case you haven’t already picked up on this, I’m a jeans and t-shirts girl. I wear Converse more than heels. I didn’t wash my hair today. I’m wearing my glasses right now. I’m not exactly someone who is super concerned with looks. So when I stumble across a really hot guy who’s just waiting for his big break, sure, he’s nice to look at, but that’s about it. My experience thus far with male actors is that they are far too concerned with looks and outward appearance, that I would look like a hobo next to them, if they even gave me the time of day.

Lately, I’ve been trying to still do the okcupid thing. I’ve been failing miserably, so I’m of course putting in minimal effort at this point. Minimal effort means just looking through profiles and saving people to my favorites list. When looking through them though, if someone’s first picture is CLEARLY a head shot, I don’t even both going any further. I don’t bother messaging them or saving them to my favorites list because let’s be honest. I’m secretly mocking the horrible posed shots and I’m not sure my Future Hubby is going to be on board with me mocking him. And if all of their pictures are head shots. Well, shit. Bust out the popcorn and prop you feet up for a night of laughter. In what world would any girl want to date a guy who’s only photos are staged awkward poses that scream “Hey, I’m an actor!”

Sure, this could all change. I could one day meet a normal, totally down to earth actor who is drop dead gorgeous, but I’m not holding my breath. I’m open to any possibility, but I’m not going to purposely seek out guys with head shots online or scour the local Cheesecake Factory for the next Brad Pitt in hopes that he’ll ignore that fact that I ordered the Four Cheese past and ask me out.

The exact moment I met Tom caught on camera

This entire letter is a completely moot point as well, if you happen to turn out to be one of the amazingly hot guys in my top five…or is that top 10….or 15. Whatever. We all have that list of guys that we’d date in a heartbeat, even if we already have a boyfriend. Dominic Cooper, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Chris Pine, Ryan Gosling. Plus, after this years Comic-Con, when I was introduced to Tom Hiddleston and he said “Have we met before?” I lost my shit. He thought we had met before! Clearly Tom knows we’re destined to be together.

So unless one of the okcupid head shot boys can top Tom Hiddleston’s profound introduction and show that they can be both a normal, down to earth guy and an actor, the chances of me dating an actor are slim to nil. Not that I’d be against it, I’m not not going to seek it out. It’d be like if I actually believed Tom and I were destined to be together. Deranged idea that’s just full of disappointment.

Xo,
Your Future Wife

Curious about other cuties

8 Sep

Dear Future Hubby,

If you like me, does that mean you’re going to grill me about the other guys in my life? Is that your way of sizing up the competition?

Boys are confusing. Yes, I’m stating the obvious for every single girl ever, but it’s true. I just don’t understand why boys do some things. I’ve recently noticed a friend of mine, a guy friend, doing something…a little bizarre in my opinion, and I’m not exactly sure what to make of it. One of my closest guy friend, let’s dub him Premiere Pal, has been inquiring a lot about other guys in my life, if I’m seeing someone, how that date with so and so went.

Nick likes Trish. Norah's with Tal. They like each other. For the love of god can they just date each other?

Premiere Pal and I have been friends for about a year now and I’ll admit, when I first met him, I got a little bit of a crush on him. However, at the time, he was totes taken. Major fail, indeed.  I moved on though and we remained close friends, talking almost daily. He’s been really supportive throughout the past year and everything that has gone on, which honestly, is nice to have when you’re single and you’ve become slightly bitter cause life is always a little easier when you have someone to share it with. Then, a few months ago, he became single. Say what??? Yeah, that’s right. It was kind of awesome, until I realized he may have had a thing for another one of our friends. A girl just can’t win, can she?  So I again, got over it, moved on, but was still super tight with him.

However, over the course of the past month or so, we’ve actually gotten to be closer, and his feelings towards our other friend have changed, or so he tells me.  Almost every time we talk now, or go out form drinks, or find ourselves at the same party, he inevitably brings up guys in my life. Being such a close friend, I have divulged quite a bit to him about my love life, so needless to say, he has a lot of ammo, but dude, there are tons of other things you can talk about with me. I can’t even count how many time he has brought up Current Crush. He never used to care this much about who I liked or who I was dating, so what’s the deal? Why do guys go that?

This is the part where any girl would begin to over analyze.  Does this mean he likes me? Why is he so curious? Does he want to go on a double date or something? Is he just hoping I find someone to date so he can have another guy friend around? Of course I do secretly hope that the answer to the first question is yes, but then again, I don’t want to get my hopes up. I did that when I first met him and he was taken. I did that when he and his girlfriend broke up, and then he went after someone else. Either third times the charm or I just need to move on. So until then, I’m just not going to read in to. As another friend just told me, don’t read into it because then if he likes you, you will be pleasantly surprised. Sure, I may have already starting going “What does it all mean?” but I can let it go. Better late than never.

Just don’t keep asking me the same questions over and over. Current Crush is still going to live across the country. Double Threat is still going to be a douche and only reach out to me when drunk in a bar. I’m still going to be weirded out going on a first date with anyone from okcupid. Music Guy is still going to blow me off despite seeming like he wanted to go out again.  If you keep asking, I may get so annoyed that I won’t even care anymore if your interrogation actually means that you are just sizing up the competition in the hopes of one day asking me out.

Xo,
Your Future Wife

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